Saturday, December 4

Euthanasia - his verdict for her.

Euthanasia refers to the practice of ending a life in a manner 
which relieves pain and suffering.

He saw nothing, felt nothing.. compared to what they saw and what she felt. It's a story of a brother who was seeing all the pain from the distance. The sufferer was her angel sister, a sis who was fighting for her life. A life which she had just started living. 

Cancer was it, bloody reason for all the troubles of her life. In simple words, the army of cells protecting her body from external attacks, was now responsible for attacking it. It all began with a small stomach pain. And it was never better. He knew for sure it was just another pain and everything was going to be normal as ever.

He could see all the signs, but he was always positive. Nothing gonna stay that long. And he was always wrong. Every update from the doctor was worst than the last update. It was almost 8 months, every possible thing was approached for. 

He could see her getting weak, and with the decrease in the body's potential to tolerate pain. Doctors knew it, she knew it, they knew it, he knew it..all could see feel it. But none, never in their wildest dreams ever had imagined it to come true. None wanted to believe, that the girl so brilliantly nice, simple, sweet and with the most beautiful soul was there at the end.

The pain was untolerable, yet he could see her smile. There was no more peaceful sleep, nights were no longer a place to sleep. The pain was throughout. Her single cry in pain, was unbearable for him to handle. It was kinda miracle to see that smile every morning with such a painful night and day before. 

And one day she talked about euthanasia to her mom.
She knew about the pain, she knew what she was asking for, her mom knew what her daughter, the best-est daughter ever was asking for. But all she could do, to take her away from such thoughts. 

She kept asking it again and again. It was the most difficult thing she could ever ask her parents, her sister. But she did, the pain made her do it. 

Soon came the last night, the last night he wished her "good night"...the last night she asked for euthanasia, the last night of pain, the last night he could hear her voice.

The last night, that painful last night for her.
God finally choose to end all her troubles, she was called up there at heaven. 

PS : Once she talked to him about her will to leave the world. He still revisits those memories, the painful memories, the beautiful memories, when she asked him to look for everyone after she leaves.
If she would have had asked for his verdict on euthanasia that time, it was a no for sure. He wasn't that brave as she was.

In This Fast World, Stop a While, look Around 
Appreciate What You see..
You never know whats gonna happen next . 
Then Why Worry.. Lay Back And Relax. 

Appreciate and Enjoy Life

Tuesday, October 12

Tagged Myself ;)

Have tagged myself, from a fellow blogger's blog.
It was quite a while somebody tagged me, so i tagged myself :)

10 How's

1. How did you get one of your scars? no scars yet :)

2. How did you celebrate your last birthday? full family day :)

3. How are you feeling at this moment? Smiling, happy :) though having fever ;)

4. How did your night go last night? lovely one, though without any dreams :|

5. How did you do in high school? Superb.

6. How did you get the shirt you’re wearing ? i don't remember.

7. How often do you see your best friend(s)? very less.

8. How much money did you spend last month? Rs 2500.

9. How old do you want to be when you get married? 28+

10. How old will you be at your next birthday? 22

Nine what’s:

1. Your mothers name? mummy :)

2. What did you do last weekend? no idea.

3. What is the most important part of your life? family, love.

4. What would you rather be doing? painting, sketching.

5. What did you last cry over? quite a while.

6. What always makes you feel better when you’re upset? Music, a episode of F.R.I.E.N.D.S, and talking to some frnds.

7. What’s the most important thing you look for in a significant other? Understanding.

8. What are you worried about? life after engineering. 

9. What did you have for breakfast? cheese grilled sandwich, yummy !!

Eight you’s:

1. Have you ever liked someone who had a girlfriend/boyfriend? i guess no.

2. Have you ever had your heartbroken? no never.

3. Have you ever been out of the country? Nopes !!

4. Have you ever done something outrageously dumb? must be some many of them, but dont remember any such now.

5. Have you ever been back stabbed by a friend? Nopes !!

6. Have you ever had sex on the beach? Nopes !!

7. Have you ever dated someone younger than you? Yep.

8. Have you ever read an entire book in one day? Never.

Seven who’s:

1. Who was the last person you saw? Daadi.

2. Who was the last person you texted? No idea.

3. Who was the last person you hung out with? A friend !!!

4. Who was the last person to call you? My love :)

5. Who did you last hug? My Maami :)

6. Who is the last person who texted you? Don't know, its been 3-4 months sms's banned in the state.

7. Who was the last person you said “I love you” to? Obviously my love :)

Six where’s:

1. Where does your best friend(s) live? skip.

2. Where did you last go? College.

3. Where did you last hang out? its been quite a while, dont remember.

5. Where is your favorite place to be? HOME :)

6. Where did you sleep last night? on my bed :D

Five do’s:

1. Do you think anyone likes you? Many

2. Do you ever wish you were someone else? Not at all.

3. Do you know the muffin man? :O Nopes !!

4. Does the future scare you? Yes.. always !!

5. Do your parents know about your blog? Yes, they do !! 

Four why’s:

1. Why are you best friends with your best friend? Skip skip.

2. Why did you get into Blogging? i loved the idea to write something in a virtual space.

3. Why did your parents give you the name you have? No idea.

4. Why are you doing this survey? have fever and nothing interesting to do :P

Three if’s:

1. If you could have one super power what would it be? to make everyone smile :)

2. If you could go back in time and change one thing, would you? Never :)

3. If you were stranded on a deserted island and could bring 1 thing, what would you bring ? My love.

Two would-you-ever’s:

1. Would you ever get back together with any of your ex’s if they asked you? No, and i never wish that happens. 

2. Would you ever shave your head to save someone you love? Yep :)

One last question:

1. Are you happy with your life right now? Yuuppieee…. I am always happy* see my teethes :D :D
*conditions apply !!

Friday, September 24

Love You Till The End.

Isn't it amazing when you have that one friend, with whom you are the true you, the true being of yourself. You just want to share everything, and even silliest of the things. The one who understands your's silence. The one who's always there to guide you, support you. 

And isn't it million times more amazing when you have such friend right there in the family, right besides you. But when that person leaves you forever and all you have is just the feeling of that person around you and the beautiful memories shared, its infinite times painful. Life no longer remains the same.

I just want to see you 
When you're all alone 
I just want to catch you if I can 
I just want to be there 
When the morning light explodes 
On your face it radiates 
I can't escape 
I love you 'till the end 

I just want to tell you nothing 
You don't want to hear 
All I want is for you to say 
Why don't you just take me 
Where I've never been before 
I know you want to hear me 
Catch my breath 
I love you 'till the end 

I just want to be there 
When we're caught in the rain 
I just want to see you laugh not cry 
I just want to feel you 
When the night puts on it's cloak 

I'm lost for words don't tell me 
All I can say 
I love you 'till the end

PS : I miss you so much..

Wednesday, September 22

6th sem xams - How come They Went Well ??

First of all let me make you clear, doing good means a level better than what i did earlier in previous semesters. I sincerely i don't expect a mind blowing percentage, neither don't i ignore the fact of getting a suppli (failing) :P

#1. The fear of knowing nothing,  (even toppers say they know nothing :P but i literally mean it). That had so much scared me. And this made me study sincerely during prep holidays.

#2. One very very important person of my life always expected me do well with my exams someday. I just gave a shot this time, and did pretty well. And feel so good about it. Damn good :')

#3. Decline in online surfing, and specially total Facebook avoidance in the first few papers, magically created so much extra time.

#4. Some good music, kept me going. Specially the song "I'm Yours". Every time i got bored or felt sleepy, single dose of this song kept me going on and on and freshened me up every time i heard it.

#5. Zero percent useless wastage of time on phone calls. Plus the benefit of Sms ban in J&K.

#6. Have a beautiful poster on back of my room's door. It so much motivated me, every time i thought its so difficult, it kept me moving with so much power. It had these lines :
Before you say: "I CAN'T"...
say: "I'LL TRY!"


#7. The fact that i did so well in the first exam despite studying it for the first time, gave me so much encouragement for the coming ones.

#8. My room was locked throughout day and night, so no external disturbances :P

#9. The fact that not for once i thought to cheat. For the first time had the confidence that i would manage myself well alone.

I hate the fact that people expectation's rise after you do well. Please don't ever dare to do that. It was just for once. At least currently i think so.

And at least as far as result is concerned, i never cared for that, nor do care this time.
To summ up, "I am happy, that i did per my levels"

PS: If you are looking for your name in the above points, a message for you "you need to find a apple and i love you so much :) " 

Sunday, July 11

I think a Lot.

Currently too i am too thinking about it. It the biggest negative point of i want to get rid of.

I say something bad to someone, and here goes my whole night thinking about- what i did? was it correct? what will it result into? and endless questions.

Something bad happens with me, and here goes another night wasting time to think was i at fault? what should i do next? and don't know what else my stupid tiny brains thinks.

Ahh, i so much hate this.
Will try to get rid of it.
Its just a document post which will keep reminding me that i think a lot. Hope i don't think the stupid crap anymore and concentrate on many other important things !!

PS : Wish me luck !!

When You're Gone

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were, yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah

PS: My bestest sis dedicated this song to my 2nd bestest sis on her wedding. It was so apt for that time. But now it totally means some different meaning for me. Missing you riki :'(

Friday, July 9

Miss You Sis :'(

"I swear to you-I will always be there for you-
there's nothin' i won't do.."

Was walking back home, heard this lines. But sometimes you plan so much for life, you work hard for it. And one day all ends :'(

PS :
I'm missing my sis so so much.
Still dont want to believe she has actually left me.

Wish i could be there for her throughout my life.
All I have is, some beautiful memories :'(

Monday, May 17

An Angel for him

23rd September 1989, biggest idiot ever was born. Within few days of his birth, the management team up there at heaven realized, that this idiot wouldn't be able to survive among the wise, intelligent and cruel people who already existed on planet. After long hours of meetings, finally a decision was taken

"This kid needs a sister, who takes cares for him and guides him through some difficult times of his life"

Immediately an e-mail was sent to his parents. And the response was negative.

"Something has to be done"; God announced.

Exactly 105 days later, 5th January 1990, a decision was taken to send an angel, specially for this idiot. A girl was born in his family, (maamu-maami's daughter) And that day on she was always with him, probably she had strict orders from the almighty to do so.

As they grow older, the bonding between them went stronger and stronger; specially in their teens. He often used to spend the weekends with her, discussing the weirdest range of topics, from newest crushes to newest gadgets. Being in the same class, they often solved maths together and he always kept wondering how she answered multiplications like 754*23 so quickly. Being creative in nature she always kept surprising everyone with the new new things she came out with.

One of the most beautiful things i remember about their relation was that the girl used to call him bhaiya, despite of being just 4 months younger. And he loved being called "bhaiya", until he realized that her friends also called him so :p :p :p... But still he loved to be her elder brother, and care for her, share some exclusive secrets with her. Together they had some best times, so many trips, so many dinners, so many ice-creams...and some endless moments to cherish.

2009 was the year
Suddenly lord asked his management team, "yaar its been 19 years; how is our special angel, have been missing her lot these days, bring a report on her".

Best daughter any parents could had, best sister any brother or sister could have, best friend any friend could get...& best person the boy had ever met. God realized that the angel has done her job superbly, he immediately passed orders, bring my angel back, the heaven needs her, i need her...

Actually that day a war was declared between the heaven and the family on earth, which longed for almost an year, none wanted to let go off her. It was 23rd April 2010, she finally took the decision...

She made him learn so much, so so much through her thoughts, her expressions, her care, and specially with her powerful smile that even in the most difficult times he manages to smile. Though she's not with him anymore, but actually she is still there :))

PS : I miss you...

Monday, May 10

Eleven worst tips ever..

PS : Probably i don't follow most of these tips, but i wish someday i and most of people around me follow these one day, some beautiful day...

#1. Have some mercy on dustbins, they want to get filled. And have some mercy on my and yours mother earth, she needs to stay beautiful. Start with wrappers, try keeping them in your pocket till you find a needy dustbin.

#2. Someone cares for you - Appreciate It. You have attempted 30 marks paper, still you need 10 more marks to pass. Someone behind you give's the answer for 20 more marks...never ever forget it :P

#3. Care for your close ones. You have attempted 90 marks questions, and you know the remaining 10 marks too. But better is to help your friend who is stuck at 35 and needs 5 more marks to pass.

(Could have given better examples for point #2 and #3, but i preferred the stated examples :p :p :p)

#4. Don't discuss about the people you hate. Forget them, assume them as invisible, rather than gossiping the negative things about them.

#5. Believe me, no one cares more for you than your parents. Respect their ideas. I know its not possible to implement most of them, but at least acknowledge them.

#6. You can never force someone to love you. But try being lovable so everyone loves you ;)

#7. Power, electricity; in short energy resources are not unlimited. A room with no one in, should have all its power switches off, that's what you need to do, simple as it is.

#8. Everyone has the right to enjoy his life in his own way. You don't need to interfere with it.

#9. Try smiling this very moment, you will feel good. And try to keep this smile in an infinite loop at certain regular moments of program called life :) :) :)

#10. Instead of wishing someone via sms/Facebook/etc etc...give him/her a call. Personal touch is really missing these days. A greeting card or a flower will be perfect add-on! And if the person is really really close, a kiss, a hug will do the magic.

#11. Seriously people think BIG.

"One Act of Random Kindness at a time..thats all "

Wednesday, April 7

Stupid Enough

1st Day at college, excited..yet so terrified he stepped out of the car. Buzzing crowd..loud music, this was what all that could be heard. And in between was the sound "oye white shirt.." ; turned back he saw 3 people calling him...probably callin he was wearning white. Soon this was confirmed when the next call was..."oye white shirt, blue jeans.."

"Yes Sir"

Sir ke bache, apna intro de..

"Sir, myself Shivang....Shivang Oberoi..
just got admission in computers !! "

Bas bas, listen, you able to see the girl in maroon top near the administrative block.
Go and propose her..

He tried to deny the order, and with no other options he went ahead,

"Excuse me dear, this is my ragging going please dont mind.." he had just said this much...seniors came closeby..he continued...
" i dont you, you dont knw me...but since last 23 seconds i have known enough that i can spend my entire life with you.., it will be stupid of you, if you say "yes"right now..but atleast i want you to consider it.."

Without any word, the girl in maroon named Shruti left the place..

NEXT 4 Years.. shivang's surprise, shruti was his classmate..and moreover next roll number's to his. they both had the best times in the 8 semesters that passed...they did every lill bit of collg work together...and had some great understanding among each other. Whole college believed them to be love birds...but to each other they were clear of being the best friends..and so on the life moved..

Soon came their's graduation day, Shivang decided to wear the white shirt, blue jeans combi..which he wore on the very first day of college life. Day ahead was moments of superb it was the last day of their's college life.

"Beep beep.." shivang's phone was shruti on the other side..!! "Oye shivi, jaldi se administrative block ke bahar aa.."

On reaching the block, he saw shruti sitting on the he moved close..he heard shruti whisper these words..

"Idiot, 4 years back you asked me a question on these stairs... you never tried to know its answer after that day".. Why??? Do u know what.. "If you would haved asked me the same question again...i would have been stupid enough to say yes, right there and then..." and "for whom do you think i am wearning maroon today.."

PS: Like a dream you can't explain, love can chase a beating of your heart, Like the sunshine in the rain, love can make your whole world fall apart... All i wanted now. I just wanna spend my life with you...Time will show me how !! Suddenly everything has turned me inside out, Suddenly love is the thing that I can't live without ♥ ♥ ..

Friday, April 2

Single Sibling !!

"You don't know being a single sibling is a blessing from God", "You are a single kid, you have no idea how lucky you are", "You must be getting all the attention", "You must be getting whatever you ask from your mom dad.." & so on....

I generally hear such philosophies from people who don't belong to this category of being single child. For them being single is like some great great thing. Try putting yourself in following situations i'm going to scribble below..
  • You are experiencing an emotional breakdown, its 3 in the morning, do you expect to trouble your parents every time for small small issues of life.
  • You and your mom-dad don't agree on some demand of yours, and you have nobody to back you.
  • You get an over protective care from them, and its start getting irritating after some time.
  • Very often you tend to be the total focus of attention of parents, especially non-working mothers. Child space and independence goes zero.
  • Most of the time our parents are correct, but sometimes the generation gap do jumps in, and you alone cannot make them understand it.
  • You just had a terrible fight with them, at least there should be someone to tell you who was correct.
  • You just fell in love with a beautiful girl in college...
  • And in my case, whom to tell when i get a new crush every month or two..
  • You want to play double player games.
  • You want to abuse someone, knowing that you would get abused in return without any harm feelings.
  • You need someone to tell, the shirt you wearing isn't looking good on you.
  • You need someone to fight with.
  • You generally get over-depended for small small things.

You generally find substitute for your sibling, be it in cousin form, girl-friend, or your best/special friend,...but you will always land up realizing that you have a limit for that as each one of them have a life of their's own..and you cannot intrude into it every time you get an emotional breakdown or got a new crush... moreover the personal touch still remains missing.

I agree the positive points for being single kid must be equally strong, may be it so !! As the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence. But still i personally feel being a single sibling isn't good for me at all..

Saturday, March 13

Its not just an another post..

"You'll never know how..
sometime, somewhere, someday..someone
will change the way you are"

Sunday, February 7

Take some time out..

>>Being Busy - An easy way out for avoiding things or people whom you don't want to interact with. But what if you are really busy, specially if you are a loads of things to do.

-Mood Swings
-Money management
-Individual passions

But have you ever wondered, all the things in the above list take you away from real you. You mold yourself in a socially acceptable cast. In tech terms you program your thought process to being busy all the time so you don't get to know the real situation of your life.

Take some time out..

Just one day dedicated completely for you. With your loved ones, and i guess Sunday's perfect or some holiday. Other than this go for a long-drive alone with no destination to reach. Take a small walk, and if its raining nothin compared to it. Do some crazy things.

Smile alone with no reason, sing out loud your favorite music numbers, break an old empty pen, watch tom and jerry, kiss your parents gud nite, change your hair style, see some old photos, and a long deserved sleep..most of the online addicts really need some sleep. Sleep for 12-14 hours.

And most importantly whenever you do this, or even if you have done so...please share it with me. I would love to hear it.

PS- I am very happy today !!

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